Masters Magic

Arnold Palmer

As I sit here, a Trevor Immelman (?) sits atop the leaderboard at Augusta, with 8-under-par.  I feel as though he might have a better seat than I, even if it may be short-lived.  Meanwhile, Tiger Woods was set to tee off a few minutes ago.  Yesterday, “he bored” the crowds by coming in “only” at even-par.  As they say though, a bad day on the golf course is better than any day in the office.  My office being a cubicle in the library, writing about pollution in the Mediterranean Sea.

Anyway, I should have made predictions yesterday, but as I didn’t, I will go ahead and shoot them at you today: this Immelman guy is not going to stay atop the leaderboard through today, tomorrow morning at the latest.  Phil Mickelson won’t drop like a bucket, but he’ll play well and end up top ten. I see Zach Johnson as having the confidence to make a good showing, but I don’t think he’ll repeat. The hometown (my hometown, not yours) favorite, JB Holmes will look like he was born on the golf course.  He wasn’t, and I don’t think he’ll win, but he’ll continue building upon the notoriety he has been gaining in the past couple of years.  That Woods fellow will win.  This is a safe bet, but I know this because Jack Nicklaus doesn’t want to talk about it.  That means his record will fell soon enough…In the event that Tiger doesn’t win, I am voting for Retief Goosen.  Augusta is a democracy, right?

Also, Colin Montgomerie might just make the trip so that he can heckle the Chinese player, Liang wen-Hong.  Maybe they don’t want you, Colin, because you are pretty sour most of the time?  Also, anyone want to bet that Sergio spits on Rory Sabbatini at some point? I mean, let’s face it, Sabbatini will say something to piss someone off…


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